HOW TO BE HAPPIER EVERY DAY
- Written by Eric North aka “The Happiness Warrior”
The first and most important step is to believe that we deserve to be happy! We can all be happier when our mindset is aligned with our intention and belief in ourselves. Once we know and understand that happiness is within our control we can start the process of bringing more happiness into our lives and the lives of others.
The first thing to do before we take any action is to take a good look at our current situation. We can then ask ourselves what’s making us happy and what’s not. When we take an honest look and take “inventory”, we can start the process of retraining our thinking. This creates a mindset where we can begin to make our lives happier and more purposeful. It requires self-awareness, which may be difficult at first. Discovering who we are and what we want out of life is what being happy is all about. Learning to be happier can be an exciting journey of self-discovery that brings clarity into our lives. Happy people are more likely to find their purpose and feel more fulfilled and hopeful.
For many of us, finding our purpose can be a winding and difficult journey full of unkept promises and wrong turns. We say we “should” do something without taking action and feel discouraged and beaten up when we don’t. Sometimes we blindly follow tempting lures full of empty promises and end up feeling disappointed and broken-hearted. Others resign themselves to working for money and prestige and feel unfulfilled and disappointed in their outcomes. In cases like these our sense of purpose can fade away and become a distant memory of who we really are.
It is counter-productive to believe that our careers and wealth are our entire purpose.
We’re always more in control of our destiny than we think we are. By changing our mindset and learning to believe in ourselves, conquer fear, and understand the importance of the words we speak, we create a path for success and greater happiness. This is a daily process of developing healthy steps and routines to get us through our day with a much deeper sense of purpose and gratitude. We can finally feel that life is moving forward with increased focus and determination. It takes work. It may not be easy at first, but by developing a more productive, and self-confident mindset anyone can create a life filled with more gratitude and happiness. When we feel happier, we have increased opportunities and better choices to bring our dreams to life.
As the Happiness Warrior, I want to help everyone understand the incredible powers and greater happiness that can come from developing good habits and healthy routines. In times of change and uncertainty, good habits will help us to create the discipline needed to move forward, adapt to change, and live happier lives. Good habits can start off as something that might seem small or insignificant at first. We step before we walk. Know for certain that every good habit makes us better able to care for ourselves and increase our sense of well-being.
Habits become important routines and rituals to help get the most out of every day. Good habits are made by making choices that will improve our lives, increase productivity, provide more time to take care of ourselves physically, improve life-balance, and create more happiness. Good habits allow us to progress and be happy. Those with poor habits and unhealthy routines fail to progress, feel frustrated, and increasingly unhappy. Good habits help make us part of the solution for change in and good in the world!
When the pandemic began last year, I took a deep breath, allowed one loud “WTF” to escape from my mouth, and tried to understand what was happening and how it was affecting the people around me. All I could think about was my need to hold myself together and be a more effective leader to help others get through the chaos. I was in good shape mentally and physically to begin with, but I knew I was capable of being better. I made a vow to myself that I would improve myself in every aspect of my life by the time the world began to feel more stable again.
The first thing I did was look at my routines and habits to refine and improve upon them. I took my morning routine to a higher level, improved my already healthy diet to boost my performance, mood, and immune system. I sharpened my focus and looked for ways to be happier and turn around what could have been a drama-filled year of disappointment into the most powerful and life-changing period of my life. It was the year of reinvention and despite everything I was energized and ready for action.
All of this was accomplished by refining my good habits and building more powerful routines. Each small habit kept expanding into better habits that helped me to thrive, learn from others, and take more control of my health and vitality. I became a better leader and set my course on being the example and part of the solution.
Developing good habits requires making easy mindset changes by increasing self-awareness. We can then identify bad habits and begin replacing them with good habits. Good habits become good routines and healthy routines are the framework for creating a happier and more optimal life. Good habits can take up to three weeks to become fully incorporated into our lives. Beating ourselves up does more harm than good! Happy people never beat themselves up for failure, they forgive themselves, they learn and grow.
HEALTHY HABITS THAT WE CAN BEGIN TODAY
Each of these new habits are meant to be life-changing and can be slowly used to create routines to increase happiness and quality of life:
--Schedule energy expenditures to suit goals and accomplishments.
--Healthy socializing is important, try to do at least one social event either personal or work related each week. Make it fun by “showing up” and feeling your best. Wear something that makes you stand out.
--Get started early, productivity increases with less distractions.
--Maintain a “ready for anything mindset”. Life is going to surprise us and being ready for anything is a mindset for success and peace of mind in times of adversity.
--Set short- and long-term goals, manifest dreams through an intentional mindset.
--Take time to relax and disconnect through meditation, vigorous stretching, and breathing.
--Active Listening. Listen and let others share their thoughts and opinions. There’s a difference between acknowledgement and respect.
--Eliminate self-defeating thoughts and self-created negative emotions. None of these need to be or are real: guilt, shame, poor self-esteem
--Take better care of physical health: exercise, sleep, nutrition, rest/recovery. Understand how truly alive we feel when we make the mind/body connection.
HOW TO OVERCOME BAD HABITS
Bad habits get us nowhere and replacing them with good habits is a way to make them stick and improve our outcomes in every facet of life:
1. Focus on what we want to change.
2. Identify triggers and remove them.
3. Ask for help from others. Helping is the gateway to a happier life.
4. Practice self-awareness (mindfulness).
5. Replace each bad habit with a good one.
6. Send yourself reminders, emails and written notes placed strategically near trigger points,
7. Forgiving yourself is important. Being hard on ourselves is a sure way to keep from moving forward. Never use phrases like “I’m my own worst enemy”.
9. Don’t try to change everything overnight. Being patient with ourselves is a kindness as well.
10. Change or remove any toxic environments and take a good look at friendships.
11. Use visualization (intention) to realize goals. The Law of Quantum Physics applies to all of us.
12. Use metrics for motivation and rewards.
HOW TO MAKE HABITS THAT STICK
1. Commit to 30 days, 3 weeks is the average time needed to make a habit automatic
2. Make it Daily- consistency. If we miss a day we can start again.
3. Start Simple and set reminders.
5. Stay consistent, discipline is key. Self-discipline provides self-esteem for greater happiness.
6. Form a ritual and enjoy the peace of mind that it provides.
7. Replace lost needs such as television or social media for relaxation with reading a book or exercise.
8. Get a buddy to help stay accountable.
9. It’s okay to be imperfect, change doesn’t happen immediately
10. Use words like, “you’re doing it” not “hoping to”. Hope implies that we don’t believe we can do it!
11. Remove temptation.
12. Look for positive role models.
13. Visualize what would happen if we reverted to old bad habits. What do you think will happen if you give into temptation? The worst-case scenario is usually close to the truth.
14. Write it down, type it out, intention makes it happen!
15. Make sure these habits are consistent with your goals and aspirations
Making resolutions without first having a stable core of healthy routines and habits will cause any resolution to fail and add to our list of disappointments. Incorporating healthy routines into our daily lives will help us find the momentum to move forward and be prepared with a “ready for anything mindset”. The best thing of all is that it makes us and everyone around us happier!