I always say that most of us are our own worst enemies. Not a day goes by when I don’t see people tearing themselves down, struggling with self-created doubts, and losing touch with their inner happiness. At times we tell ourselves that it’s noble to be martyrs for imaginary enemies and sacrifice ourselves without a purpose or plan. We ignore our intuition and can’t see the choices ahead. To make matters more challenging, life in a pandemic has only increased our isolation, confusion, and dysfunction. Sadly, we find it so easy to tell ourselves that we don’t deserve to be happy and put our dreams on hold.
In these uncertain times, everything can feel like it’s moving too fast, stress overwhelms us, and before we know it our hopes and our authentic being is long forgotten.
In our quest for survival, life can quickly pass us by. We think that punishing ourselves is what we deserve, and we rarely give ourselves a break and allow ourselves to be happy. So many of us have lost touch with our inner power and feel like we’re barely making it through each day. We’ve forgotten that the only permission we need for living our best lives comes from the spirit within us.
Why do we treat ourselves this way when a happier life is right in front of us and just waiting to happen?
Almost twenty years ago I managed to break free from a long-term abusive relationship. Over the years of abuse my natural happiness had been replaced by fear and repression. I felt like I had nowhere to turn and had run out of options. My abuser had removed most of my friends and family from my life and I was alone, depressed, and miserable. It’s no way to live for anyone but the worst thing of all is that I felt like I had lost my control and direction in life.
There’s a point when we've hit rock bottom and there’s nowhere to go but up. At my lowest point I rediscovered my long-repressed warrior-like nature and began to rise. In my vulnerability and pain, I found my purpose and strength. Nothing is more humbling than forgiving ourselves for our failures.
When we learn to think like a warrior, we realize the importance of forgiveness and the value of seeing life clearly. Perspective is everything and wisdom is always hard earned. I’ve long forgiven myself for my past, but the lessons were invaluable. It’s one thing to suffer from abuse but it’s another to let it ever happen again. In my subsequent recovery and reinvention, I discovered my long-denied authenticity and revealed my true self through my vulnerability. I became whole once again and quickly turned my life around.
As I began to navigate life as a happy human once again, I created a warrior mindset to expand and grow. My natural leadership abilities increased, and I began to impact more lives for the better. Everywhere I went people began to remember me as someone who made them feel good and noticed for who they are. Life can be magical when we believe in our personal power and connection with others and the energy of the universe. Our vibration rises when we care about others!
The happiest times in life are when we’re serving and creating purpose in our lives. Being a warrior for truth, happiness and understanding is the mission that gives me purpose. Acts of good are acts of kindness and raise our empathy and understanding. This is the path we can choose that provides the most enlightenment, compassion, and happiness. Wisdom is the fruit of patience and loving who we are.
GIVING YOURSELF PERMISSION
As The Happiness Warrior, I believe that giving ourselves permission to be happy is the key to creating the lives we dream about and becoming our own warriors for the happy lives we deserve. We can create the joy that is missing and find happiness in ways that we’ve never imagined when we change our mindset.
I believe that happiness is a basic human right and one that we all deserve. We can all be warriors for ourselves but when we are at our greatest when we care about the greater good for all. It is then that we feel the joy and purpose that comes from service and being our own best creation. We will change the world together when we are united in our mission.
CONQUER FEAR AND FEEL ALIVE
When we live in fear, we live under another’s control. Distractions are based on fear of the unknown. Try to observe and watch rather than react and feel the wisdom that grows when we see things clearly as they are. Lies are the refuge of the weak and inauthentic.
When we practice self-awareness and see ourselves in our truth, we realize that the surface that we see is just an illusion. So much of what alarms and excites us is propaganda that’s designed to divide and control our thoughts, relationships, and values. We are easily led at times much to our great peril. Learn to think freely and feel your inner warrior.
When we begin to see things clearly our vibration rises, and we connect more fully with the energy and wisdom of the universe. The truth lives in our genuine feelings and appears in the actions that we take. A warrior thinks of the good of all above their own desires. They seek to be the best to help others who’re looking for guidance. Warrior’s care about the common good and strategize for the future. They lead with a natural grace and are always ready for life’s challenges. Perspective is everything we need to become great warriors. When we change our perspective, we change our mindset.
HEALING IS EVERYWHERE
As humans we encounter a number of hurtful situations throughout our daily lives. Many of these are self-inflicted and extremely harmful. We can’t grow when we’re constantly beating up on ourselves. Often the enemy is within while it’s projected on someone else. We love to be complimented but we are adverse and angry when criticized. We care too much about what others think and spiral into depression and despair and suffer the consequences.
A warrior is always able to look beyond the surface and see the bigger picture. As natural leaders we live in our intention and self-discipline is the guide. We’re always healing from battle and tending to our spirit. We know that happiness is found from within and cannot be taken from us. How clearly do we feel the joy that comes when we ascend from our lowest depths? A warrior can both protect and spread happiness by being able to see the good that comes from challenges.
THE POWER OF INTENTION
I like to look at personal intention as a fusion of realism and optimism. Both are essential for growth and happiness. They are critical for cutting a better path through life that will create more value and fulfillment. Intention plays a protective role in mental health as well as the physical. Everything in our bodies and minds are intricately connected. How we choose to create this mindset is how we create the lives that we deserve and dream about. Know that optimism is the opposite of fear. It’s the fuel that creates greatness and one that we can all rely on.
Realism is how we view the world based on facts and realities. Realism is an essential component of optimism. Realism helps us see the world without fear and exaggerated expectations. While optimism fuels leadership and creativity, realism helps keep our feet on the ground and make life’s victories much sweeter!
BELIEF STARTS WITHIN
One of the most paralyzing things that happens to many of us is that we get stuck in negative belief patterns. Many of these are societal and provide the means to control our minds and behaviors. They reduce our ability to think freely and realize our best selves. They create a downward spiral that can easily be reversed just by changing the words we believe in and say aloud. These truths are universal:
--Everyone is worthy, and no one is better than anyone else.
--Start telling yourself that you deserve something and prove that you have the courage to change and rise.
--No one will respect us until we respect ourselves.
--The future that we predict is never going to happen. Listen to your intuition and settle your fears. Life will always be better on the other side of fear.
--Money will always be important to our survival, but when we consciously provide value in our actions, we are making the world better in a way that money will never provide. Money has more value when it’s made with integrity and truth.
I’ve taken a lot of risks in my life and have always loved to flirt with danger. It’s not that I’m irresponsible but I’ve had a lot of jaw dropping adventures that stimulated my thinking, created greater empathy for others, and increased happiness in my world and those around me.
I have the self-discipline that propels me forward in life and core values to be ready for anything. I have a burning desire to live my life the fullest and not miss out on opportunities to learn and grow. I may have come close to the end more than a few times, but if a cat has nine lives, I have ten!
Most of my more colorful adventures occurred when I was young and eager to experience and explore. I saw startling things that shocked me to the core at a young age that also helped me discover my core values. I was unafraid of new places and new things and open minded without fearing others. It was a great way to see the world and an invaluable education. It gave me a perspective on inequity and inequality that strengthened my purpose and mission.
Developing a warrior-like mindset is not for everyone but living in truth and authenticity requires a strong mind and strong spirit. As humans we all have these qualities within and can use when we choose the right path and realize our intention. The choices we make are ours alone. When we choose happiness, our lives and experiences will expand. Life can be a magical journey of fulfillment and purpose when we believe in ourselves and make the right choices!