• Written by Eric North aka “The Happiness Warrior”

Every one of us has been rejected at one time or another. It’s a fact of life and a feeling that can cause us great shame and unnecessary self-esteem destroying emotions. It’s feeling that many of us shrink and hide from, but it’s also a feeling that we can learn to deal with and ignore.

Rejection can hold so many negative consequences, but it can also be a powerful tool for change and growth in our lives. It’s usually the reason we use to hold our lives back and lives, It keeps us in a constant need of validation and approval from others. It’s a lesson if we choose to see its value. It’s up to us to set our destination.

We can feel greet pain from the feelings and emotions that rejection produces and or we can use it see ourselves more clearly with love and acceptance for who we are.

Rejection is a great equalizer that we can use to raise our intentional power. It can change our lives for the better and lead us to our true path. It can be a relief and safe harbor when we’re headed in the wrong direction. When we can see past our ego we can always feel our truth.

As The Happiness Warrior, I believe that perspective is never constant and that we are always evolving towards a new dimension. How we see and feel things in the now can hurt at first, but the sting always brings us self-awareness. We can choose to be defensive and confused, or we can change our attitude to be grateful and happy. Is rejection another way of discovering our gifts and self-directed powers?

We never know the reasons or thoughts in someone else’s head, but we’ve felt the reaction in our internalized emotions. We begin to sense the clarity comes from waiving off their judgment and rejection. It’s natural and human to want to be liked and accepted but we must know the boundaries of what can be reasonably acknowledged.

As The Happiness Warrior, I like to dig deep and think about the self-created torments that many of us share. The self-created suffering, hurts, and rejections that all of us feel at one time or another and the wounds that they have caused us. These harsh lessons can seem cruel and unrelenting but if we stop and listen to our thoughts and emotions we can use it to create a better understanding of ourselves and our emotions.

We can learn, we can build resilience and we can create more self-awareness and truth. Our most miserable and lowest points can be a bridge to greater understanding. We can say to ourselves what we won’t accept any longer. We can rise and reinvent ourselves. We can create our authentic being by changing the story we tell ourselves. We can use rejection to thrive and raise our vibration. We can never again succumb to failure and regret.


When I was growing up fear of rejection was always a close companion. I was afraid to be myself and knew that I was different. My story wasn’t my own and I often felt compromised and unhappy with myself. These thoughts and feelings intensified as I grew older and began to understand and accept who I was. I struggled with my sexuality and greatly feared discovery and projection. I lied to myself, to my family, and friends. I lived my life for others and desperately tried to conform. I dreamed of an unimaginable time when I could stop hiding and fearing myself.

As I became an adult I began to stop avoiding my truth, but I still felt the shackles of rejection. I had insecurities that kept me locked up and defensive. My relationships suffered and I was targeted by abusers. This created a period of solitude and darkness. I felt trapped and began to live just to survive.

There came a point when I had enough, and I began to see my life more clearly. I broke from the past and began a new journey. I searched for people who were happy and changed my intention. I began to feel what happiness meant once again and shared my inspiration.


It’s the attitude that we take in life that helps us create a happier and more magical journey. We have  choices to make and the power to reject our own negative feelings and self-created harmful emotions. It’s easy to fall into the trap of victimhood, but it takes work to see ourselves for how we really are. We can escape from this trap and listen to our inner truths. This is the way forward and repelling the unnecessary heartache that can come from rejection:

Rejection is:

1. A tool to help us be better.

2. Never personal.

3. Reminds us that we are human and connected to the universe. It keeps us humble and helps us live in our truth.

4. Teaches patience and resilience.

5. Helps us to explore different paths and can redirect us to something greater.

6. Enables self-awareness and encourages us to do better.

7. Facilitates reconsideration of goals.

8. Creates opportunities for change and adaptation.

9. Encourages us to find new solutions.

10. Makes us stronger and more resilient.

11. Offers opportunities for growth.


All throughout history we’ve learned of greatness that comes from insurmountable rejection and struggle. These are the stories of people who live by their self-belief and intention. Everything is possible when believe in ourselves, why let rejection control our power and momentum?


As I always say, “life isn’t worth living if we can’t be ourselves”. Why care about the judgment and shame from some we don’t even respect or believe in? Look closely at the people around us. Do they hold us back and keep us from dreaming?

Always look for people who celebrate who you are make you happy. A passive aggressive friend is the same as an enemy. They will hold us back and do anything to keep us from reaching our potential.

Regret is a dangerous weapon that can hurt us forever. Look for people who are smiling and happy. It’s always a pleasure connected with others who share our vision. Happy people create more happy people. Happy people are healing.

I believe that life is a great game that all of us can play and the attitude we take is how we play to win and enjoy our lives. It should never be too easy and doesn’t have to be as hard as we make it. Every failure or heartache is a redirection to another path to something better. Use words that empower rather than hurt and feel the magic that comes from empathy and understanding.

Everything in life is a gift and everything we do, and experience is an opportunity for more wisdom and self-awareness. Feel the happiness that comes when we believe in ourselves and break from our self-created bonds. Happiness is the anti-dote to rejection!

ERIC NORTH - The Happiness Warrior

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